Something Bothering you?/Daily Doldrums

[DandyGuy]

Well ive been by my self for some of my teenage years. Does fighting myself count?

[saerleiya]

Does fighting myself count?

Precise the meaning. You mean fighting against your own body or thoughts or something?

[DandyGuy]

Thoughts.

[saerleiya]

Yes, of course. Tons of questions, dumb thoughts and strange dreams. But it happens at any stage of your life after that anyway, it's just that it's a real mess when you are a teenager. But it's not the same thing as confronting others' judgement.

[DandyGuy]

My thought are not dumb. There disturbing

[saerleiya]

Okay, why wouldn't there be soem disturbing stuff in there? Shiet, I have tons of disturbing stuff in my own head

[Bzzit]

I'm a little bit pissed regarding college/university and their incompetence when it comes to certificates. First of all, my university sent me the certificate for my 100% completion of Summer school with my last name misspelled to "Piainetersen". This wasn't too much of a problem, as they just for some odd reason repeated my forename within my surname so I just asked for a new certificate through email; making note of my name to ensure they didn't mess up again. About a week later I receive another certificate, only this time it was worse: they misspelled both my forename and surname to "Ian Peterson" rather than "Iain Petersen". I understand my name is pretty awkward to spell, but I had purposely made a note of my full name in the email, knowing they would have my name in their records too, so I found this especially annoying. I then asked politely for yet another certificate which like the other, arrived about a week later. This certificate boasted the correct spelling, but the paper itself was all bent and creased which led me to just stick it in a plastic wallet and forget about the whole ordeal.

Today, I was meant to receive my grades for college on a certificate through the post, so yesterday evening I cynically thought to myself that I bet something bad happens regarding my certificate -I was right! I received a phone call from the college informing me that they had messed up the posting process of my certificate and I would "hopefully" receive it in a weeks time. It seems everyone else from my college has acquired theirs on time just fine, so I guess I'm just cursed with extremely bad luck when it comes to certificates. I was really looking forward to finding out my grades today like everyone else.

[Keane]

Do not forget you are still 16: it's hard to be able to understand some complex aspects of subjects such as this one when you are young. Being able to stand back from the details takes time, expecially while you are living such a "terrific" period of your life (teenage years were incredibly hard for me to live too). However, you are right in the way that it's hard for people to accept that young ones eventually grow and become adults. I've done that with my youngest brother, only realizing I was beginning to ignore his own growth as a person until a few months ago.

My mother doesn't just need to accept something, she needs someone to tape her saying what she does, and then have her really think about how ridiculous some the things she says sound. She doesn't want me to follow the news, she doesn't want me to look at media (movies, music, etc) critically, she doesn't want me to interact with people I have things in common with, and she'd prefer I keep away from certain hobbies. She wants me to be one of those overly sporty guys who are always flirting with girls and being the biggest extrovert at all the parties. She keeps claiming she's so worried about me and my health but is too stuck in her believe I'm this incapable person who doesn't understand and because of that, no matter what I say, she doesn't even fucking listen because I can disprove her claims entirely and she'll still be all "No that's not how it is!!".

Hard to tell to your own parents of course. My advice: your parents are right in many ways, but that doesn't mean they are always right. When you are becomnig an adult, you can start to understand that you can make your own choices and decisions based on your own experience. Others may have some answers, but the final one is the one you choose yourself. So even if it's hard, don't try to explain your parents why some of your choices are the way they are until you feel it's right moment to do so. Most of the time, it wo'nt be before you could live without their help and be independant. At that moment, even if they disagree, you could simply tell them: "this is what I am, and I'm fine with it. If you are not, maybe it's sad, but I won't accept blindly any judgement upon myself".

Yeah but that's the problem: I'm constantly being told to explain my choices, yet when I do they either don't care or go "Now look here son, I just said that I feel disconnected from you and don't even know who you are anymore, but here's my speech about how I obviously know you better than you do yourself!". It's fucking disgusting. The amount of times my mother has gone "Oh I remember what a fun person you were back when you were younger", or the amount of times she's gotten angry at me for having anxiety. It's just, I don't even know how to explain it. When my mother starts talking on that subject I feel like wanting to slam her against a wall or just leave the fucking house for a day. What am I supposed to say? I'm sorry mum, your right, social anxiety can be easily cured by just going "I'm not gonna have it anymore!" in my head? She's the type of person so ignorant that she'll never understand a single concept until it actually happens to herself.

[saerleiya]

My mother doesn't just need to accept something, she needs someone to tape her saying what she does, and then have her really think about how ridiculous some the things she says sound. She doesn't want me to follow the news, she doesn't want me to look at media (movies, music, etc) critically, she doesn't want me to interact with people I have things in common with, and she'd prefer I keep away from certain hobbies. She wants me to be one of those overly sporty guys who are always flirting with girls and being the biggest extrovert at all the parties. She keeps claiming she's so worried about me and my health but is too stuck in her believe I'm this incapable person who doesn't understand and because of that, no matter what I say, she doesn't even fucking listen because I can disprove her claims entirely and she'll still be all "No that's not how it is!!".

Then do it while at school or something and show her it's worth. I know you are in a bad situation, but I am not able to see how to help you as everything you told is that nobody can't debate at all with your mother.

[Earth Gwee]

I would suggest having someone outside of your family talk to her, someone who she'll be more likely to listen to about your problems with her. Not sure if that'll help, but it's worth a shot.

[saerleiya]

I would suggest having someone outside of your family talk to her, someone who she'll be more likely to listen to about your problems with her. Not sure if that'll help, but it's worth a shot.

There we go, what I couldn't find, you said it o/.

[Adsolution]

I'm not sure I can see that sort of thing working, personally. Unless your mother is very open-minded, she would likely perceive that as either you being too weak to talk to her yourself, or dismiss it all as the kid not knowing what he's talking about and that she's the kid's mother, or maybe the fact that he's talking to someone else about his problems and not to her she'll perceive as 'disrespectful'. I get that vibe from Keane's mother.

[saerleiya]

What solution would you bring, then? If she doesn't listen to anybody, even to Keane himself, I don't know what he should do.

[Shrooblord]

"terrific"

You mean terrifying. 'Terrific' is 'amazing'.

What solution would you bring, then? If she doesn't listen to anybody, even to Keane himself, I don't know what he should do.

Ignore her. If she won't listen to Keane, he needs not listen to her. At all. Maybe that's the shocker that will put her in the right state of mind for once.

[DandyGuy]

What solution would you bring, then? If she doesn't listen to anybody, even to Keane himself, I don't know what he should do.

Just say this.
"What the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) did you just ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) say about me, you little ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)? I'll have you know I graduated top of my ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) in the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), and I've been involved in numerous secret ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) on ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), and I have over 300 confirmed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I am trained in ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) warfare and I'm the top ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) in the entire US armed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). You are nothing to me but just another ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I will wipe you the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) out with precision the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) of which has never been seen before on this ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), mark my ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) words. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) think ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) can get away with saying that ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) to me over the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)? Think again, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). As we speak I am contacting my secret network of ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) across the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and your ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) is being ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) right now so you better ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) for the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). The ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). You're ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) dead, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I can be ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), anytime, and I can ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) you in over seven hundred ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), and that's just with my bare ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). Not only am I extensively trained in ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) combat, but I have access to the entire ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) of the United States ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) off the face of the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), you little ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) comment was about to bring down upon ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), maybe you would have held your ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). I will ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) fury all over ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) will ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) in it. You're ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) dead, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)."

[saerleiya]

"terrific"

You mean terrifying. 'Terrific' is 'amazing'.

I justified it before...

Just to point out that where you say "terrific", you probably meant "terrifying" or something like that. "Terrific" generally means something very good.

It's of course irony here: if you say you have passed through your teenage years completely unscathed with 0 conflict with other people, you are probably lying.

What solution would you bring, then? If she doesn't listen to anybody, even to Keane himself, I don't know what he should do.

Ignore her. If she won't listen to Keane, he needs not listen to her. At all. Maybe that's the shocker that will put her in the right state of mind for once.

I justified that too.

Others may have some answers, but the final one is the one you choose yourself. So even if it's hard, don't try to explain your parents why some of your choices are the way they are until you feel it's the right moment to do so.

I actually answered that to Ad' because he countered Gwee's solution in bringing another person, more understanding and seemingly 'mature' to Keane's mother, to come and talk with her.

[Shrooblord]

How does

Others may have some answers, but the final one is the one you choose yourself. So even if it's hard, don't try to explain your parents why some of your choices are the way they are until you feel it's the right moment to do so.

answer in any way what I said with

Ignore her. If she won't listen to Keane, he needs not listen to her. At all. Maybe that's the shocker that will put her in the right state of mind for once.

?

Anyway, Keane, you're only sixteen for crying out loud. Your whole life is ahead of you. If you feel bad about yourself, it's you who will have to change something. Nobody can really make you change. They can help you see that you must, but you are the one who will have to do it. No pressure - I don't mean it that way - but if you're unhappy, there's only one person who can solve that problem.

[saerleiya]

They can help you see that you must, but you are the one who will have to do it. No pressure - I don't mean it that way - but if you're unhappy, there's only one person who can solve that problem.

That, reminds me of somebody.

[Shrooblord]

We're realling talking straight passed each other here. xD
What do you mean...?

[saerleiya]

We're realling talking straight passed each other here. xD

hehehe.

What do you mean...?

I've been feeling like this for months already. But I'm not a teenager. At least it's getting better right now.