The wishing and granting game

[PluMGMK]

Granted but all your clothes disappear.

I wish I owned Opera Software ASA.

[Sabertooth]

Granted but you diiiieee

I wish this forum had more chortles

[PluMGMK]

Granted but the number of useless messages rises 1000-fold.

I wish spambot accounts were deleted.

[Sabertooth]

Granted but so is Hunchman's.

I wish I could own a Canadian.

[PluMGMK]

Granted but it's RayFan.

I wish I had a bigger monitor.

[Sabertooth]

Granted but it gets bigger every day.

I wish they would make Knuckles' Chaotix 2.

[PluMGMK]

Granted but it's rubbish.

I wish the English RZ was still purple.

[Sabertooth]

Granted but all the text is pink.

Why does the Irate Gamer suck?

[Rayman9930]

Because granted it does. I wish spam never exists!

[Sabertooth]

Granted, but you get banned.

I wish Superman was my best friend.

[Rayman9930]

Granted, but you are kidnapped and destroyed by Lex Luther before you meet Superman.
I wish I had a decision maker.

[PluMGMK]

Granted, but the decisions it makes get you thrown in jail.

I wish all verbs were regular.

[Sabertooth]

Granted, but you can no longer use them.

I wish I had good taste in movies.

[Rayman9930]

Granted but you don't know which juicy one to pick first.
I wish it was vice versa.

I wish I had good taste in movies.

[Sabertooth]

Granted but they all suck.

I wish Hitler had been killed by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

[Rayman9930]

Granted, but the universe freezes up.
I wish that didn't happen!

[Hunchman801]

Granted but you keep repeating the same thing again and again... oh wait, that's already the case

Granted, but you find out its gone. I wish that didn't happen.

Granted, Hunch is overrun with requests, the server crashes!! I wish that didn't happen.

Granted, but the universe freezes up.
I wish that didn't happen!

I wish 9930 made some efforts to post decent messages

[PluMGMK]

Granted, but they're so long that they have to be deleted.

I wish that the YouTube HTML5 player would work in browsers other than Chrome.

[Sabertooth]

Granted, but it no longer works in Chrome.

I wish I could post smilies without feeling extreme guilt.

[PluMGMK]

Granted, but words now pain you so much that you can't bring yourself to post them any more.

I wish I could move my computers somewhere other than the kitchen table. (True story)