A Boy's Diary Of Raving Rabbids
Posted: Tue Jan 13, 2009 9:34 pm
Sorry, but I had to do it! Seriously, God told me to. Or Polokus. Can't remember.
(First of, this was written while I was under the impression Rayman was about 14. Second, I've named the globoxes.)
Okay, I didn't see it coming. Who could? Look, I'm just normal. I'm not God or anything. And believe me, I felt like God even less-if that's possible-while it was happening.
OK. So I'm just sitting there, talking to some Globoxes. (Their names, if it really matters, are Kenny, Jordan and Elsie)
I had been having a picnic with them, but I had to hide the basket when Elsie started throwing cherries at me.
So anyway, I was just having a conversation with the globoxes (I was slightly uncomfortable talking to Elsie, 'cos she was the kid that was throwing cherries at me only five minutes ago, and she went all huffy...girls, I ask you!) when an apple fell on my head.
Kenny started laughing.
"Cut it out! It's not funny!" I protested, grabbing the apple off my head. My protesting, however, did not deter Kenny.
However, when a second apple fell on my head, I have to admit I was the teensiest bit surprised. I mean, either it was a huuuuge coincidence, or apples really like my head.
Then suddenly the ground started shaking. I swear I was quite close to throwing up. (I didn't, luckily.) Then, with a squeak, Elsie disappeared into a hole.
"Uh, hello? E-Elsie?"
I looked into the hole where she disappeared, and very nearly got knocked over by a rabbit that had appeared in her place. Yup. A rabbit.
"Watch it!"
(Hey, it hurt. I'm not the sort of person that lets themselves get pushed around.)
Then Kenny disappeared and a rabbit appeared. Then Jordan. (With a rabbit appearing.)
"Uh, hi." I said. "Um, I don't...well..uh..I just... mmm...Do you want...an...apple?"
The rabbits just looked at me.
"Uh.." Oh God, I thought. Freaked out by rabbits. Get a grip on yourself Rayman!
(That's my name by the way. Evidently.)
"Eh...hehehe."
It is useless trying to make conversation when you have zero confidence. I should know. I've been in that position.
"Uh...Oh God."
All of a sudden, there were these footsteps behind me. I whirled around to see this Giant Metal Bunny (I kid you not) standing over me in a towering sort of way.
"UH...Hi. perhaps we didn't get off to such a good start. Well, I'm Ra...EEP." I squeaked. The giant metal bunny rabbit (I feel so stupid saying that) had picked me up via my red hood and lilac (Please, DON'T ASK) hoodie.
"Oy! Put me down you giant metal freak!"
The G.M.B.R (Which is slightly more dignified to say) did not listen. Evidently.
Instead, it carried me off.
~~~
And that, I guess, was the moment I passed out.
Ok, second part tomorrow.
(First of, this was written while I was under the impression Rayman was about 14. Second, I've named the globoxes.)
Okay, I didn't see it coming. Who could? Look, I'm just normal. I'm not God or anything. And believe me, I felt like God even less-if that's possible-while it was happening.
OK. So I'm just sitting there, talking to some Globoxes. (Their names, if it really matters, are Kenny, Jordan and Elsie)
I had been having a picnic with them, but I had to hide the basket when Elsie started throwing cherries at me.
So anyway, I was just having a conversation with the globoxes (I was slightly uncomfortable talking to Elsie, 'cos she was the kid that was throwing cherries at me only five minutes ago, and she went all huffy...girls, I ask you!) when an apple fell on my head.
Kenny started laughing.
"Cut it out! It's not funny!" I protested, grabbing the apple off my head. My protesting, however, did not deter Kenny.
However, when a second apple fell on my head, I have to admit I was the teensiest bit surprised. I mean, either it was a huuuuge coincidence, or apples really like my head.
Then suddenly the ground started shaking. I swear I was quite close to throwing up. (I didn't, luckily.) Then, with a squeak, Elsie disappeared into a hole.
"Uh, hello? E-Elsie?"
I looked into the hole where she disappeared, and very nearly got knocked over by a rabbit that had appeared in her place. Yup. A rabbit.
"Watch it!"
(Hey, it hurt. I'm not the sort of person that lets themselves get pushed around.)
Then Kenny disappeared and a rabbit appeared. Then Jordan. (With a rabbit appearing.)
"Uh, hi." I said. "Um, I don't...well..uh..I just... mmm...Do you want...an...apple?"
The rabbits just looked at me.
"Uh.." Oh God, I thought. Freaked out by rabbits. Get a grip on yourself Rayman!
(That's my name by the way. Evidently.)
"Eh...hehehe."
It is useless trying to make conversation when you have zero confidence. I should know. I've been in that position.
"Uh...Oh God."
All of a sudden, there were these footsteps behind me. I whirled around to see this Giant Metal Bunny (I kid you not) standing over me in a towering sort of way.
"UH...Hi. perhaps we didn't get off to such a good start. Well, I'm Ra...EEP." I squeaked. The giant metal bunny rabbit (I feel so stupid saying that) had picked me up via my red hood and lilac (Please, DON'T ASK) hoodie.
"Oy! Put me down you giant metal freak!"
The G.M.B.R (Which is slightly more dignified to say) did not listen. Evidently.
Instead, it carried me off.
~~~
And that, I guess, was the moment I passed out.
Ok, second part tomorrow.
