Bradandez wrote:Yeah, I didn't really like most of my fellow classmates in high school. Everyone knew me, I knew almost about no one.
Actually, I knew more about my high school classmates than they did know about me and that's probably why they were trying to make fun of me and see if I was showing myself to everyone. The problem is I didn't like the great majority of the class. Long story.
As for university, I only started to talk more to my classmates in the beginning of the second year and only figured out that one of them has got a lot of similar tastes to me around April! Going to school is much more pleasant when you know you have cool classmates to talk with!
I have this one friend who's incredibly hypocritical and pretentious at times and he always starts arguments with me and acts as if I was the one who started them. He's also always trying to shoehorn certain words that he's learned from me in the past awkwardly into conversations he has with me and his personality is very unlike mine. I never mention things like this to him as I'm afraid it'll just insult him even tough he points out similar things in other people, me included (for example he once said something I said about boats was pretentious even though it didn't make any sense and he didn't know what the word even meant, and I can't help but see some irony in that). He's kind of cheesy and kind of acts American, and he sometimes says really dumb things that I can't help but point out and it just ends up in him getting worked up.
The only reason we're friends I think is our similar interests in games and the like, but otherwise I don't know how we ever got to be friends. He's even said some pretty hurtful things to me which I really disagree on, and things which I'd never say to him; things like him saying I was bad at a certain game I was proud of and him saying I wouldn't have as many friends if I wasn't funny (something that, funnily enough, I would have appropriately said back at him if it wasn't for me not wanting to hurt his feelings). We do get along all right most of the time though.
He's the only friend I have doubts with really, the rest of my friends and I just like to have fun and mess about making incredibly offensive jokes and stupid noises and the like.
Y' know, I don't know if I'll keep up my friends anymore. They keep being asshats and jerks. Whatever, I won't give 'em any attentions. This sounds really casual and promise breaking but that's it. Screeeew it all, I don't give a shit. And nope, I'm not feeling anything about it. Bye-bye.
Haruka wrote:Actually, I knew more about my high school classmates than they did know about me and that's probably why they were trying to make fun of me and see if I was showing myself to everyone. The problem is I didn't like the great majority of the class. Long story.
Oh that's horrible. That's completely the opposite of me. I never had any trouble with anyone in high school. I was actually pretty liked and now I feel like a jerk for not really talking as much to my classmates when they did.
Haruka wrote:As for university, I only started to talk more to my classmates in the beginning of the second year and only figured out that one of them has got a lot of similar tastes to me around April! Going to school is much more pleasant when you know you have cool classmates to talk with!
That does sound nice. I'm currently enrolled in college and it feels great to be back with other people. Hopefully, I'll be able to make some friends this semester.
I'm pretty much the kid that never talks unless spoken to, which has drawn some shitty attention occasionally. I'm not concerned about it because I'll draw the line very quickly, but I hate it when people see nothing of my personality, and then when they finally do it's me telling someone to piss off. My favourite people are the ones that are OK with you just being quiet and don't try to push you into things you're clearly uncomfortable with, the kinda people you share your pencil lead and erasers with.
I'm in the same situation Haruka described. I actually think most folks are really decent, but I don't really click with anyone. I might be able to pick up an acquaintance or two if I had any social skills, but I doubt I'd make any close friends.
I feel I got off quite lightly in higher school. I had so many bad qualities back then (most of which I was in control of) but managed to get through education relatively unscathed. I was teased a bit, not to a level which coul be classed as bullying, but to such a degree that I was able to recognise my weaknesses and improve them. In that regard I consider myself quite lucky.
Nowadays I feel I can click with anyone, but wouldn't necessarily be friends with just anyone.
I'm gonna edit this post out because I read over it again and yuck, that wording sounded way more depressing than intended a little pretentious. So instead, here's Donald Trump vs. anime
Last edited by Keane on Wed Sep 02, 2015 4:33 am, edited 2 times in total.
These days I'm not really caring for my reputation, and as strong as reputation has to be and become, these days it just sounds like a word.
I have been constantly told to sit down [my classmates] and told to be quiet, but I don't. This has become like I don't really give a shit about anything.
I, yes, of course have broken my promise due to I have been annoying others (not bullying, but rather start singing in front of them, I don't / never phisically abused of someone) and I don't care since in third grade [from High School] I'll move away and I'll start learning programming.
So...
I haven't exposed my case in the adequate topic yet, but this might be the good occasion to do so.
So first of all, I'm mostly asexual, by that I mean I don't have sexual attraction for anyone, but, something curious, a part of me does, my immature self, sometimes telling me "she's hot" or something like that, thus considerably exasperate me.
I have never in my life had a romantic experience with anyone, that idea always repulsed me.
But almost a year ago something happened to me and radically changed my vision of the concept of romantic interaction.
I met someone, slightly more aged than I, 18 years old, 170cm (?) red hairs, blue eyes, and I noticed something strange, she was in many of my previous dreams, thus is the more curious, I even had a strange dream just before seeing her, first person view, sepia coloured, I saw me, sitting on a chair, with my usual shoes, feet on a table, curtains at the window, computer on the right pens and crayons in their pencil cup, and she was sitting on another chair, next to me, watching me in the eyes, smiling, seemingly laughing. Everything in a room I never saw or visited, I hear strong winds, I slightly hear my heartbeat, regular.
This, just before meeting her led me to think it was kind of... destiny related, leaving me watching her like a dog watches a screen at the first encounter (yeah, a dog watching a screen will excessively spin his head like a damn owl) luckily she hasn't saw me...
And then other dreams came, again and again, not a single night or day without thinking about that girl I never saw before and never spoke to.
A voice in my head told me in a morning "Please, do something, do it for us so we can sleep in peace".
I complied to the request...
So, you spend a fucking week without sleeping (Well thus is impossible, so by "without" I mean three hours or something like that.)
Your only way to stand up without falling on the ground is to pump the fuck up your blood by drinking a heavy dose of coffee. Disaster Incoming
Being too shy to do anything in reality I decidedto to it virtually, yup, screen is a so underrated shield...
I wrote everything I have felt describing how disoriented I was and all... And also something Raj could have said in Big Bang Theory, it would have perfectly fitted the character.
....
So, you write to someone, knowing that you will probably never get an answer and without knowing the name of that one.
Two other attempts came after that, none of them was conclusive though.
And someday she totally disappeared, thus leaving a quite worried Inco, so I started to gather as many information as possible, I successfully found her two first names, where she was, and many other things, (the most important was to know she was okay) and the more I was learning about her, the more I loved her ♡.♡
And one day came I saw she wasn't okay, she had lost all confidence in herself and to everything she was doing.
I took the opportunity to open dialogue with her and I tried as better as I could to comfort her.
Weeks passed and I talked to her, funny point is that we talked about relationships, oh God I'm so much a loser...
And she disappeared again, and something else happened, but I'm not encline to talk about it tonight, but rest assured that it is not my fault.
So, all of this took place on exactly nine months, I quite abridged it, as much as I could while trying to make the more understandable possible.
Also, a little adddition, I have hypermnesia and eidetic memory, thus causes me to almost not forget anything.
I haven't spent a day without thinking about her... And also made really strange dreams, I hope some of them will become true.
Amazing to think it is an electric signal produced by my brain, it seems to be so much more, really, thus makes me saying,
Do you think the feeling of love is just a matter of chemicals?
incognito wrote:So first of all, I'm mostly asexual, by that I mean I don't have sexual attraction for anyone, but, something curious, a part of me does, my immature self, sometimes telling me "she's hot" or something like that, thus considerably exasperate me.
If you have ever felt that, you are not asexual. It isn't good to unnecessarily confuse yourself or complicate your sexuality. Feeling attracted to someone doesn't in any way relate to being immature.
incognito wrote:Amazing to think it is an electric signal produced by my brain, it seems to be so much more, really, thus makes me saying,
Do you think the feeling of love is just a matter of chemicals?
Of course, this is no question. You see the phenomenon in many places aside from human emotion, whether it's countless resistors making a computer or countless atoms making a tree; countless chemical reactions make up a human emotion. We are so much at the mercy of our emotions, just think how a certain kind of smoke or pill (even in such small quantities) can cause our minds to alter so drastically. The slightest change or trigger can throw someone off, from the most intense feeling of euphoria to the heaviest feeling of depression, and vice versa.
I think you actively want to deny your sexuality, and that this is why you're so infatuated with her: You see her as the only possible mate, thus making pursuing her an extremely high priority, causing you to be infatuated.
incognito wrote:So first of all, I'm mostly asexual, by that I mean I don't have sexual attraction for anyone, but, something curious, a part of me does, my immature self, sometimes telling me "she's hot" or something like that, thus considerably exasperate me.
If you have ever felt that, you are not asexual. It isn't good to unnecessarily confuse yourself or complicate your sexuality. Feeling attracted to someone doesn't in any way relate to being immature.
Well, about that, allow me to explain a little, I have a weird brain, by that I mean I think like three, as an example, if my actal "me" represents 70% of what I am, my mature self represents 20% and my immature self 10%, while I am the only one with the ability to control my body, these two other parts of my mind often react to what I am currently thinking or doing, or even watching, thus explains why in most representations of myself, I represent me as three separate persons.
Like here : http://i.imgur.com/4capcMC.jpg?1
I might have a light split personality.
anaphasiia wrote:I think you actively want to deny your sexuality, and that this is why you're so infatuated with her: You see her as the only possible mate, thus making pursuing her an extremely high priority, causing you to be infatuated.
The fact I actually feel something for someone doesn't mean I am not asexual, but it only means I'm not aromantic.
anaphasiia wrote:Of course, this is no question. You see the phenomenon in many places aside from human emotion, whether it's countless resistors making a computer or countless atoms making a tree; countless chemical reactions make up a human emotion. We are so much at the mercy of our emotions, just think how a certain kind of smoke or pill (even in such small quantities) can cause our minds to alter so drastically. The slightest change or trigger can throw someone off, from the most intense feeling of euphoria to the heaviest feeling of depression, and vice versa.
The problem is that your point isn't neutral, you take it completely at the scientist / atheist point, by that I mean that you actually believe in nothing, it is purely materialist view, body and nothing else, for me (i'm actually for the dualist view) there is body, mind, and the soul.
And actually I was never, ever in my life sexually attracted by someone.
And physical interaction with someone is for me a repulsing concept.
incognito wrote:The fact I actually feel something for someone doesn't mean I am not asexual, but it only means I'm not aromantic.
Romantics and sexuality are hard-linked. They are two sides of the same coin (one is physical attraction and one is emotional - both sexual in nature and comprise desire), and it is very easy to repress one while you allow the other one to flourish. The "romantic/sexual" distinction is very much gibberish.
incognito wrote:The problem is that your point isn't neutral, you take it completely at the scientist / atheist point, by that I mean that you actually believe in nothing, it is purely materialist view, body and nothing else, for me (i'm actually for the dualist view) there is body, mind, and the soul.
What is neutral then to you? To consider abstract possibilities? That isn't neutral, it's completely arbitrary, and that isn't a discussion worth having. What I'm saying is definitely neutral, as it draws from what we know and what makes sense.
incognito, how does a "soul" work? You can only make up arbitrary reasoning based off of your own experiences and projections which are almost certainly inaccurate (since there is no controlled environment and you seem to have your head in the clouds). I can tell you (to a rather basic level) and prove to you, repeatedly, how emotions in the brain are manipulated, chemically. But you don't care about evidence do you? I'm sorry if you don't like the answer, but it's the truth, and no amount of emotional desire in your mind for it not be the truth will make it any less truthful.
Don't ask a question if you're just going to complain that the answer given is too logical. Like really, who does that?
Last edited by anaphasiia on Sat May 07, 2016 12:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Me, whenever I have a conversation with some I aboard question form different point of views, as well technical than philosophical.
And also correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel some aggressivity in your last post.
Also, this is probably gonna make you howl of anger toward me but, is your zodiacal sign the Sagittarius?
I'm making an experience. Lel.
And well pardon me but past some mental and physical exercises and lifestyle you acquire a control of yourself beyond your own body.
Actually don't believe me, books were wrote by Indian monks thousand of years before Christ.
incognito wrote:Me, whenever I have a conversation with some I aboard question form different point of views, as well technical than philosophical.
Considering philosophy is fine, but you cannot place hard science and philosophy on the same level of merit when you are asking a question that already has a clear, demonstrable scientific answer. Is an answer being clear and demonstrable not good enough for you?
incognito wrote:And also correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel some aggressivity in your last post.
It's very similar to asking what the answer is to the question 2 + 2, and then telling me I'm not being neutral because I said "4" instead of also "4, or the answer could also be fish, or the year 1947". It's frustratingly anti-intellectual. Why even ask a serious question if you're only looking for stupid answers?
"Clear, demonstrable answer" is a bit of a quick jumping. We still know so little about the human brain, and what makes the "identity", we can't pretend that there is any proofs of the absence of soul, or love or whatever.
And while I myself believe that love is mostly a chemical reaction, I can't honestly invalidate other interpretations. After all, love at first sight is still kind of a mystery. Soul or not, we don't have the knowledge yet to claim that a full materialist answer is a "neutral" or "logical" answer. It would be like refuting the roundness of the earth because we haven't seen any proof. I know there actually are proof, no need to point that out, it's an image.
And by the way, there is indeed a distinction between asexual and aromantic! There was a Day of Asexuality Awareness last month, and I learn quite a bit on the subject thanks to that! There is actually a lot of kind of asexuality. And there do exist asexual couples that share love, without feeling the need of having sexual intercourse. There are even asexuals people that have sex sometime ! Oo See, asexuality and libido aren't related: some asexuals can enjoy sex, but don't have a desire to have sex with other people.
But in the end, what I learned is that it's pointless to define who "deserves" to be called asexual. People are free to define their own sexuality, it's not a disease (despite not being a choice either, just like we don't chose to like a music).
So I don't think inco should be wrong to define himself as an asexual. He doesn't have a desire to have sex with anybody, so good for him. Maybe later he'll change (yes, sexuality can change, astonishing right), maybe he'll appreciate love without sex, maybe not… Who cares what is the “correct way of being asexual”? If there is only one able to define his identity, it's himself.
*knock knock*
Freud wrote:
Actually, he has a very strong sexual desire coming from his subconscious. I believe this desire is aimed at his mother, which is the center point of all his sexual life.
Nobody asked you, Freud! Go play somewhere else.
Your eyes are not ready for this, and your brain not prepared for that.
You should probably instead play some of these, or watch some of those. *drops the mic*(just kidding, mics are expensive)
There is actually a lot of kind of asexuality. 
And there do exist asexual couples that share love, without feeling the need of having sexual intercourse. There are even asexuals people that have sex sometime ! Oo See, asexuality and libido aren't related: some asexuals can enjoy sex, but don't have a desire to have sex with other people.
