Rayman Pirate-Community

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Strange Meeting

It was a cold, lonely night in the valley of the Crystal Mountains. The starry sky above shone brightly in great contrast to the deep and empty black, which, not unlike many other nights, stretched far beyond the sky itself, laying a mysterious veil over the outskirts of the hamlet Moonshine. The inhabitants of the village were a quiet people. Nobody envied you or disturbed you in any way if you didn't draw too much attention, but if you stood out or excelled in any form, the normally inert townsfolk would cast off their disguise and show their hostile nature. If you were weak, you would be changed into one of them; you'd go missing, only to return a few days later, empty, soulless and full of hatred like they are. However, if you were resilient, you would simply disappear, snatched away in the night, never to be seen again. Nobody would come looking for you. Nobody would talk about you. It would appear as if you had never existed.

They say - this is what they tell their children to keep them obedient - that a man, dark as the night, cloaked in a shroud of black leather, comes to take you away,far from Moonshine to devour your soul. They say he is among us, that he is one of us, disguised until the moment is right and then, only then, when you feel all alone, shunned by everyone you used to know so well, abandoned, in fear, he reaches out to you with the friendly gesture of an outstretched hand and you accept it, because you long for kindness in a world that no longer accepts you. He uses your moment of vulnerability to seize you and he leads you to the plains of Daemun Raj, Demon's Spawn, at the foot of Great Isaac, the highest peak of all the Crystal Mountains, glistening brilliantly in the welcoming sun at day and looming treacherously over you at night.

And so I find myself as one of these strong-hearted outcasts on the plains outside Moonshine, with no recollection of the past twelve hours except the image of a man's face burned into my mind. His face is full of agony and loneliness and is woeful and sad and burns with the anger of a hundred forest fires. His eyes carve their way into your soul and eat at it, until it cannot bear to exist any longer. Just before you feel it fleeting out of your tired body, his eyes fade and leave you to yourself with the itching sensation of hunger. It is a hunger that tears you apart until nothing of what you once were is left and you find yourself staring greedily at the innocent woodland critters that scurry about on the floor beneath your feet - or is it paws? I can't remember in what shape or form of creature I was before and when I look down, I see the extremities of a stranger.

Then I hear the call of that man. I know it is the same one, whose face is etched deeply into my brain, because I know the voice. It is so familiar a voice. As I look towards the place that spawned this sound, I see again the town that was once mine. With an empty heart I stare in its direction before looking the other way to Great Isaac and I can't help but feel more at home in its presence than in that of the quiet town ahead. The crackling noise of a foot coming down onto the snow draws my attention to the figure now standing behind me. He breathes heavily as he calls my name with a voice I recognise from long ago, perhaps from another life, and he stretches out his hand out to me and invites me to come. His command, no, his request he puts to words so kindly that I can't refuse and I reach out with my hand to grab his when I notice that something's amiss. The horrible sensation of recognition that before felt so welcoming struck me like lightning strikes in a storm as I looked upon the poor man's palms, that I knew oly all too well, for they were not his at all, but they were my own. I gazed into his lonely eyes and I saw me, as if in a mirror, and then I realised that he was I and that the two of us were one.
"Will I die?" I asked the man and sorrowful was his gaze as he replied to me with only one word: a deep and hateful 'yes'.

I took his hand and we wandered far, to the top of Great Isaac. There we met the man of tales, he, who eats your soul, and we looked unto each other, both saying: "After us, nevermore!"
The man looked at us with glee, with an insatiable evil he laughed and he agreed, but on his terms, for still he must feed, but now on us and us alone; and so he eats away at us every day, eternally and slowly, but I can find my peace safely in the knowledge that now the children of Moonshine are safe.
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The Ugly Barnacle

Once there was an Ugly Barnacle. He was so ugly, that everyone died. The end.
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The ugly England

Once there was an ugly England. He was so ugly he made the whole world cry. But one day the brave Scotland and courageous France joined forces and beat that ugly England until he was no more.

The End.
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The Truth behind Scotland

Contrary to popular belief, Scotland was home to the very first dinosaur, the Serzasaurous. However, unlike the other dinosaurs, she produced her own land. Evrytiem the Serzasaurous squeezed from her anal canal, she packed the feces into clumps, slowly growing to proportions unimaginable, and bridging the uncanny gap between England and Wales known as Shitland. Shitland was renamed to Scotland in the bronze era due to its derogatory nature, but recent polls have been cast to reinstate the name as it originally was, in honour of the newly discovered Serzasaurous.

The End.
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One day, the great mighty rampaging fuckers of everything in the crazy shitting planet in the vomit atmosphere adventured deep into the huge mountain of steaming psychotic dog shit and came out the next day wearing the wizard's hat of strong alcoholic beverages.
They then woke up.
The end.
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Shrooblord wrote:A lovely bridge is forming between this topic and an already existing one.

Adsolution wrote:

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The Truth behind Scotland

Contrary to popular belief, Scotland was home to the very first dinosaur, the Serzasaurous. However, unlike the other dinosaurs, she produced her own land. Evrytiem the Serzasaurous squeezed from her anal canal, she packed the feces into clumps, slowly growing to proportions unimaginable, and bridging the uncanny gap between England and Wales known as Shitland. Shitland was renamed to Scotland in the bronze era due to its derogatory nature, but recent polls have been cast to reinstate the name as it originally was, in honour of the newly discovered Serzasaurous.

The End.
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Viricide Filly wrote:Also, I live in Scotland too :I

Serza5 wrote:

Viricide Filly wrote:Also, I live in Scotland too :I

Woooo fellow Scot \o3o/

Viricide Filly wrote:

Serza5 wrote:

Viricide Filly wrote:Also, I live in Scotland too :I

Woooo fellow Scot \o3o/

Together we will destroy the pussy English and their posing WKD parties where they pretend to be drunk!

Viricide Filly wrote:Together we will destroy the pussy English and their posing WKD parties where they pretend to be drunk!

Adsolution wrote:

Viricide Filly wrote:Together we will destroy the pussy English and their posing WKD parties where they pretend to be drunk!

Fuck your swamps and fuck your hills, the English have a better climate!

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'Twas a normal day, like any other, a student had returned from his day of educational enrichment. His mind heavy, his heart sunk, his homework diary filled to the brim with daunting tasks, the student braced himself for a bad night.
But, a sight was coming, from the distance, a sight so pretty, so sublime, that the writer of this tale couldn't possible describe it with his insignificant literary skills.
What? You yearn to know of this sight?
...Very well,
pfw9unwvipnrivpn.
Erm,
foowmkowvfom
Darn it,
fwi[mvwm[vwimt[wvm,wi[.
Well, unfortunately, I cannot enlighten you on this sight, my keyboard has exploded. Happy now?
Still, I have a spare, with which I can inform you, to use your imagination.
Thank you for listening.
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Viricide Filly wrote:

Adsolution wrote:

Viricide Filly wrote:Together we will destroy the pussy English and their posing WKD parties where they pretend to be drunk!

Fuck your swamps and fuck your hills, the English have a better climate!

England contains a large quantity of orange people, chavs etc etc
Scotland contains a large quantity of whiskey.
Scotland wins.