Corrupt a wish!

[Bradandez]

Granted, but you get herpes. Unrelated to the looking into the future and stuff, you just get herpes.

I wish to have a jack-o-latern for a head.

[Maz]

You'll burn your tongue, courtesy of the candle.

I wish I'd never have to worry about money again.

[Bradandez]

Granted, you sell body parts illegally.

I wish to have a top hat.

[MisterDark'sFanClub]

Your top hat is too tall to fit inside your car, courtesy of the Mayor of Halloween Town.

I wish to be the Seven Holidays Queen!

[Bradandez]

Granted. You are now Queen of these Seven Holidays; Presidents' Day, Arbor Day, Labor Day, Memorial Day, Veteran's Day, Martin Luther King Day, and Grandparents' Day.

I wish that I had a parasite buddy.

[Shrooblord]

He eats your face.

I wish the world I know to end. Yessss

[Bradandez]

Okay. We leave you behind as the world ends and we live on Mars and survive.

I wish to have a genie.

[Bradandez]

I wish I didn't kill so many threads.

[Master]

You don't, but you become a grumpy grump who no-one talks to, thus you get ignored.

I wish i wasn't so dark.

[Bradandez]

Granted! You are no the whitest white!

I wish I knew who the real slim shady is.

[Master]

You do, but no-one said you were safe to now. Sleep tight...

I wish I didn't have these laptop burns.

[Pirez]

Now you're minuscule. Less surface of blackness.

I wish you'd help us find Hunch.

[Master]

I do, but I give cryptic clues like the crazed elder I've become.

I wish I didn't have eczema.

[Serza5]

Granted but he's away from RPC busy with ladies

I want to not look like death

[Bradandez]

Uh, you don't. But now you have super herpes,

I wish my parents loved me.

[Pirez]

Okay : now it's death that looks like you.

I wish I was a baller

[Bradandez]

You are one huge testicle.

I wished I had one dollar.

[Serza5]

You have 1 monopoly dollar

I want a monopoly set

[Master]

You get a dollar from the 1900s, it's completely worthless.

I wish I had an AC unit.

[Bradandez]

It has poison on the box.

I wish rats could dance.