Something Bothering you?/Daily Doldrums

[Earth Gwee]

@Keane: I wholeheartedly agree. And I am by no means a religious person, in the sense that I don't believe in the existence of a man who lives in the sky and dictates everything that happens in the world. I'd be a hell of a lot more scared of that than death if such a thing were possible. And yeah, a lot of theistic religions are very contradictory. I was raised Nicherin Buddhist, which focuses much more on the happiness of yourself and others and clarity of mind through the process of study and oral meditation. And while I agree with a lot of what it teaches, I choose not to participate in the practice. According to my mom, there's also a claim in the teachings that reincarnation is a thing. I used to believe in it, but after mulling it over a lot more, I find that it's just not possible as far as anyone has seen or been able to prove. OCG brought up something about a boy being able to remember how he was killed in a previous life and was able to track down the one that killed him. That's not sufficient enough evidence to me. If science can observe reincarnation as it happens, then I might change my mind. I think that's what scares me most about death is that once you've lived your life, you're done forever. There's no coming back. Life continues on without you.

So, yeah, I'm trying to be positive and focus on the life I'm living now. If I don't become the victim of a crazy person or a natural disaster or what have you, I've still got a long way to go. That's what gives me some comfort.

[OCG]

I actually prefer any religion over science when subject is life and death.
It's way less depressing thinking about death that way and I think it can affect person positively. My family religion is Orthodox but I actually have some of my own changed beliefs compared to traditional Orthodox. For example, I don't believe that man in the sky dictates everything from above but to me, definition of God is rather some supernatural force.
I also believe in concept that when every person is born, his fate was already decided and that's how his life will go and that he only has ilusion that he is deciding things how he wants.

[Acarr]

If people never died, our perspective on the world would be different. We would want a greater, better future for the world because we'll be there, instead of people who don't think past their own lifetimes. If there's no death, then there's no invention of an afterlife and there would be no need for a god. Everyone would turn to science, reason and logic. We wouldn't just have the same technology because we'd get bored of it and want better stuff. The life of an immortal would be completely different to the life of a mortal.

But, it would suck if you were the only one who's immortal because you'll have to watch people's timelines age. All the friend's you make will grow old and die without you. You'd become dissociative to people. You'll watch the earth and the universe die.

Actually, there is evidence. There is a well known case of a boy who remembered his own past life, described how he was murdered, helped police find killer and corpse of his previous body. It really turned out corpse found died on same way how boy described it. What is a real question is how can one achieve to remember their past lives since only few people do.

I like to think of life as a dream. That way if any thing bad happens I can tell myself its just a dream and ill wake up.

How could you tell if you're using the toilet in your sleep or not?
Life can't all be butterflies and rainbows... you learn from bad experiences.

Thats not the point you missed it entirely. There's nothing wrong with viewing the world as a Dream. Just easier to accept death or no death at all because its a dream and you cant die in a dream only be awoken. Anyways Earth Gwee, its up to you to choose what ever way you wish to view your exists be it real or dream like. I have a feeling the architect of the Universe did not build a stairway leading no where.

If you end in hospital, with a life-threatening disease, you'll still be freaking out like the rest of us.

[DandyGuy]

>If you end in hospital, with a life-threatening disease, you'll still be freaking out like the rest of us.
Oy Vey... That's why I like to view the world has a dream.

[Xenon]

I wouldn't want to be immortal but it would be cool to hibernate for a few centuries after a human life, then pick up from there. It would be so interesting to see the way language, technology, culture, science, fashion all develop over that amount of time.

[Acarr]

I wouldn't want to be immortal but it would be cool to hibernate for a few centuries after a human life, then pick up from there. It would be so interesting to see the way language, technology, culture, science, fashion all develop over that amount of time.

You could get cyrogenically frozen?

[Xenon]

I hate the cold, so I don't think that option is for me.

[Itooh]

Plus there's the “eventuality” that it still isn't operational.
(according to what I've read on the subject, it's still just a way to kill yourself)

And even if we get that right, I would be a little bit scared of an Idiocracy scenario.
See you in 50 years! *20 centuries later* Hey, what are these abandoned cold boxes?

[Acarr]

Plus there's the “eventuality” that it still isn't operational.
(according to what I've read on the subject, it's still just a way to kill yourself)

And even if we get that right, I would be a little bit scared of an Idiocracy scenario.
See you in 50 years! *20 centuries later* Hey, what are these abandoned cold boxes?

Yeah, that would be a nightmare.
Now I'm just thinking of the "Go God Go" episode of South Park, and the film "The idiocracy".

[anaphasiia]

Hi people, it's been a little, missed me?
I was having thoughts abiut this topic couple days ago. I don't and never have seen death as something depressing or sad. Heck why should it be? It's completely natural that a living being stops to live at some point. I'd be worrying if someone would never die.... What's really important is, is how you deal with your own fragile life. You could stay all day long at home and do absolutely nothing or you fucking get out of the house and live out your life! Like how is it so nicely called: You Only Live Once! You know what's also really nice? If you set a life goal and once you archive this, you can finally peacefully die (well not suicide obviously, but you get my point).
And I do believe in a soul, and to my religion the only real purpose of life is to prove yourself that you're worthy enough for afterlife.

Eventual death I think is one of few causes for chronic depression you can never satisfy, because it's so mysterious. So scary, so unknown. You're lucky you can accept it that easily, it doesn't get in the way for you wanting to live your life. Then again, fearing death gives some the motivation to be proactive and do great things.

I also believe in concept that when every person is born, his fate was already decided and that's how his life will go and that he only has ilusion that he is deciding things how he wants.

If we look at cause and effect, that's true.

[Keane]

So to continue off of previous posts here from a little bit back + recent You Game posts, this sad motherfucker tried to go outside today. The art exhibition was closed. My information source must have had the time wrong because locked doors and no lights...welp, least I tried.

I haven't really had any change in my feels as of late, I'm still completely stuck in thought on where the fuck my life is at this point and where to take it from here. I'm trying, to the best extend I can, to be social, but this isn't really a simple "just talk more!" matter, and as I mentioned previously I should probably eventually consider professional help regardless the price. I'm lacking years behind, and even if the want is there, I mean, asking to go to the bathroom is something I need to rehearse and clear my throat for. We're pretty deep in the failure pit here.

But it's not going away though, and I really don't have it in me anymore to ignore such a pressuring problem and try to look past it. I want to reach out to people, and further this shit in any possible, but I can't ask for help, nor am I really looking for pity. There's just no proper way to improve things as of right now, but I don't know when there will be. If anything, I'm just on a road to a much bigger problem, where school ends and I gotta start entering jobs and college and shit while being completely unable to function in any of it. I don't see myself immune to suicidal tensions, or to depression on a much more severe level, and I'm really seeing myself head there with every year that passes. I can still joke and mess with my problems now, I don't know how that'll be two years down the road.

TL;DR, I still feel like a completely rejected outcast, but I guess I'm at least attempting to stir it somewhere. I just, again, don't know what to do. Practicing social interaction is obviously not going to make it happen, this is social anxiety rooted down to such a deep level that there is no approach like that available anymore. Just fuck man, every day in the past two weeks has been feeling completely meaningless and yet more vital than the rest of the year. I don't know what the fuck is going to come out of all this, but I'm really kinda scared of myself at this point.

[anaphasiia]

Unless I really know you well, it's hard to give advice on something so personal. But, from the way it sounds, your problems are probably related to your mind being stubborn and not wanting to open up, even when you try your hardest. So I have a question, and I don't mean to look the wrong way:

Have you had experience with alcohol or marijuana? The reason I ask is because they're able to do for you exactly some of the things you're trying to do, as well as help you open your mind for yourself. I don't mean it as a solution, because you'd want to be able to be open when you're sober, but maybe it can help set a goal, or give a frame of reference about what you are capable of. See how it feels to not be afraid when you want to ask to go to the bathroom, compare that to how you usually feel when you do and see what your sober self can learn from your non-sober self.

I used to be very socially anxious, and I still am, but this has helped me quite a bit. Honestly, more than any psychologist ever has. I know there are good ones, but I guess I was unlucky. The same thing mightn't work for everyone, but I think it would be throwing away a very therapeutic solution to not at least try for a little bit if you're really lost and feeling out of options.

[Acarr]

If anything, I'm just on a road to a much bigger problem, where school ends and I gotta start entering jobs and college and shit while being completely unable to function in any of it. I don't see myself immune to suicidal tensions, or to depression on a much more severe level, and I'm really seeing myself head there with every year that passes. I can still joke and mess with my problems now, I don't know how that'll be two years down the road.

You'll most likely find people who you can relate to in a new environment especially going away to college/uni, where nobody knows who you are: you could be anyone. The things that could happen in the future, the times that'll make you laugh and smile... It'll be exciting! Don't think about how things could get worse, you don't know what you'll miss out on in the future. Don't take drugs or alcohol either to make yourself feel better because that can lead to a slippery slope. Get yourself some professional help and of course we're always here to vent out to. College/uni's usually have free counselling sessions as well. Seeing a doctor is not a waste of time or useless, because you can learn things about yourself.

[anaphasiia]

Don't take drugs or alcohol either to make yourself feel better

That wasn't my suggestion at all.

[Acarr]

Don't take drugs or alcohol either to make yourself feel better

That wasn't my suggestion at all.

Well, I can't tell any more since you've now edited your post.

[anaphasiia]

I only edited the last line on the second paragraph so it's not confusing, nothing much. I don't want my post to come off the wrong way.

[Acarr]

I can understand how alcohol can help in social situations (I've never taken drugs), since it's essentially liquid-confidence but it can be dangerous for people who are depressed as they can end up relying on it.

[anaphasiia]

For Keane, the issues he raised were largely not being able to socialise. So if he started relying on drinking (which wouldn't be good), something he would only feel like he has to do around other people, since he probably isn't prone to spend time socialising all the time (if you're grounded like I think Keane is, you won't just go from having a small social life to an extremely active one, or any sudden changes like that), it still wouldn't be something he would do all the time.

But just to be clear, I wasn't suggesting using it only to feel better (that again wouldn't be good), rather as a way to learn. Imagine you decide to try drinking for the first time one night, and you find you break out of your shell for the first time ever - you can consider how you're thinking differently and how you've managed to let go of your inhibitions, and you can try to apply that to your sober self.

[Acarr]

But that's not going to help, as like I said, you can end up relying on it.


Besides Keane is underage.

[Xenon]

I disagree with Acarr. The vast, vast majority of people are able to control their intake of alcohol, and it's an excellent tool for debilitating your nerves. I've used it before to get through tricky situations, not gonna lie. And I don't think Keane is underage, although I could be wrong.

Marijuana though? I've never tried it, but it's illegal in some countries...