FART

[Keane]

> airport inspection opens backpack
> fully filled with poo

[Ambidextroid]

> put poo filled bag in airport xray
> xrays heat up poo and explode
> bomb threat screams
> I assure, just poo
> Everyone cheers

[Keane]

> airport alarms go off, terrorist is in the building
> i storm in with my poo gun, spraying my shit everywhere
> security guards drown in my poo sea
> plane attempts to leave, i shoot poo at it until its so covered it cant hold the weight and crashes
> shoot my poo into the airport's ventilation, poo starts coming out the walls everywhere in the building

[Ambidextroid]

> I take an unbelievabley titan megadump in the ocean
> World's water supply permanently 50% my dung

[Keane]

> shit inside entire US nuclear arsenal and set it off
> create pooclear winter
> poo particles surround all of earth for a thousand years

[Ambidextroid]

> Poo in volcano
> Earth cracks apart from the inside
> earth's shards leave and enter space
> earth is just my uninhabited poo now

[Keane]

> wnat to impress girl
> shit on her table

[Cairnie]

I still haven't learned to fly using fart I do apologise

[Ambidextroid]

Learn from thunderpants

[Pirez]

I've stopped farting at 7 AM.

[Ambidextroid]

Still no farts

[Pirez]

You beautiful man.

[Ambidextroid]

Aww

[Pirez]

you will be henceforth known as "muh bro"

[Ambidextroid]

I'm honoured

[Cairnie]

I ate a marrow last night but it hasn't turbo charged my butt so I'm disappoint

[Ambidextroid]

I didn't know they held such promises

[Cairnie]

I knew I should have eaten chickpeas instead, they are the ultimate fart catalyst

[Ambidextroid]

I wonder how much lead there is in this banana

[Lysol]

At least 50 a day is a nice ratio.