Jokes topic

Post by **Steo** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:00 am

Using Google translate to try speak another language

Post by **The Jonster** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:04 am

Jesus can walk on water, correct?

(Yes)

Well, I can walk on cucumbers. As you may know, cucumbers are 98% water. So - I am 98% Jesus.

Post by **Steo** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:06 am

Jesus could walk on water?

Chuck Norris can swim though land.

Post by **The Jonster** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:07 am

After years of loneliness, I finally worked out a great dating strategy. I’ll pretend to be gay. I’m going to make tons of chick friends, really get them to trust me, tell me everything… and when they haven’t got an ounce of suspicion left – BOOOM!

I’ll get their boyfriends!

Post by **Steo** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:10 am

While vacationing in France, Chuck Norris went out for a casual bike ride and accidentally won the Tour de France.

Post by **The Jonster** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:13 am

You’re really sucked up.

I ate you.

You’re a stupid grass mole.

Having an argument in the times of auto correct.

Post by **Steo** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:16 am

I get better and drink loads of beer. Hahahaha that's a good one right

Post by **The Jonster** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:18 am

“Waiter, could you bring me some tooth picks, please?”

“I’m sorry sir but you’ll have to wait a little bit, they are currently all in use.”

Post by **Steo** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:20 am

Husband: "Right now, for this Women's Day, I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world!"
Wife: "Oh dear, I will miss you!"

Post by **The Jonster** » Sat May 19, 2018 4:21 am

About 4,000 years ago:

God: I shall create a great plague and every living thing on Earth will die!

Fish: *Winks at God and slips him a $20 note*

God: Correction, I shall create a great flood!

Post by **Steo** » Thu May 24, 2018 9:07 am

Internet Explorer is good.

Post by **The Jonster** » Thu May 24, 2018 3:08 pm

Steo wrote:Internet Explorer is good.

......

Anyway here's a bad joke:
“I am a master of fast calculations.”
“OK, what is 758 time 642 divided by 5?”
“22!”
“Ha ha, that’s wrong!”
“Might be, but it was fast!”

Aaron · Post by **Aaron** » Sun May 27, 2018 10:16 am

What do you call blueberries playing the guitar?

A jam session.

Post by **The Jonster** » Sun May 27, 2018 10:54 am

Finally, the spring is here! I'm so thrilled I wet my plants.

R4Y_ANC3L · Post by **R4Y_ANC3L** » Thu May 31, 2018 2:29 pm

What Kind of blooming flower can Kiss?

Tulip(Two Lip)

Post by **The Jonster** » Thu May 31, 2018 2:55 pm

Why did 7 8 9?

Because 1 2 3 makes more sense!
Yeah I made a bad one

R4Y_ANC3L · Post by **R4Y_ANC3L** » Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:54 pm

Aaron · Post by **Aaron** » Sat Jun 02, 2018 3:16 pm

Why didn't Microsoft make Windows 9?

Because they said nein!

Post by **The Jonster** » Sat Jun 02, 2018 3:19 pm

Aaron wrote:Why didn't Microsoft make Windows 9?

Because they said nein!

And yet people also ask why the iPhone 9 doesn’t exist

Post by **Steo** » Sat Jun 02, 2018 3:52 pm

The Jonster wrote:
Aaron wrote:Why didn't Microsoft make Windows 9?

Because they said nein!
And yet people also ask why the iPhone 9 doesn’t exist

The S9 does though and yet here I am with an S8

Rayman Pirate-Community

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