Misheard Or Generally Stupid Sayings!

[R4Y_ANC3L]

What about "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me".

So what that's saying, is that someone should be ashamed of themselves because I fell for one of their tricks, but then if they fool me again, I'm the one that should be ashamed of myself? That's illogical to me in so many ways, especially since all people are different.

Well unless a person is a gullible son of a b!tch, I would understand. But it is illogical in a way. I mean, who really benefits from the situation where someone is being fooled twice?


Another saying that is underrated(in my opinion) is "Don't Judge A Book by its cover". This saying supports things that are judged quickly by its appearance on the outside but you are yet to see that it is an outstanding something. I see.

Take me or yourself on the attitude of cartoon network for example. There are currently new shows that are probably made in 2018 being shown there. And when you take a look at them by trailers or other things, you get disgusted and you would never want to see that show and the thing is, you never actually watched it yet.
"You are judging a Book by its cover" But come on...knowing where and how things are going on their own, your mind just tells you "no, it is bullsh!t" and it would probably be right. There are things in this world that are good and just bloody horrible to even look at, furthermore a waste of time to see such things.

That saying would rather work with something that has a lot of potential that makes it worth seeing.

[Steo]

I noticed that a lot of people pronounce "merry" the same way as "Mary". When I say it, the E is shorter, but I've noticed a lot of people are basically just saying "Mary Christmas".

I'm pretty sure it possesses 2 R's for a reason.

[PluMGMK]

Well, it's a thing that happens in some dialects.
It's like in Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs 2, where they name the giant strawberry "Barry". I simply did not get the joke, since I thought they were just saying "Berry", which isn't a name.

[Steo]

I assumed that most Irish people would pronounce it the same, but a lot of people on the radio were saying it like "Mary". I guess it's another case of everyone is different.

[Steo]

Bump

I just remembered about another silly one. I was ordering beer for me and my dad a few years ago and I said "can I get a tray of Tennents please?", she replied "a tray of what?" while sounding surprised, so I said "Tennents" then she replied "Oh Tennents, I thought you said a tray of cans and I was thinking cans of what!?" then she found it quite funny as did I.

[R4Y_ANC3L]

What I don't get is "Can't" is a man who never tries.


When you say you can't do something, it is more like admitting something rather than saying that you give up on something and not trying at first. That saying only makes sense because people use "can't" as a foolish excuse but it is not so bad to tell the truth that you are unable to do something.
You try so hard but you don't succeed and it is bullshit to the adsolute max.

That is a really bogus saying.

[Aaron]

What I don't get is "Can't" is a man who never tries.


When you say you can't do something, it is more like admitting something rather than saying that you give up on something and not trying at first. It is only bad because people use "can't" as a foolish excuse but it is not so bad to tell the truth that you are unable to do something.
You try so hard but you don't succeed and it is bullshit to the adsolute max.

That is a really bogus saying.

I agree, I can't not get annoyed by some of my asshole classmates if they can never leave me alone for one second in peace without saying my name for the 1000th time until I answer because I know he's just gonna say some dumb shit which is just bs and I don't wanna listen to that one guy's insignificant bs all the time when I want to listen to the teacher who's actually saying stuff for us to write which is important and he's seriously stressing me out. Also, yeah, I agree, sometimes it's better to say and admit the truth to something you're just unable to do and this is why I hate when people tell me not to get annoyed over it for like the 1000th time when I can't not get annoyed over it because they say some really rude, unrespectful, just pure wicked stuff to me. How can I not outrage or get annoyed over that? Sometimes it's better to accept the truth like you said and whenever people say "don't get frustrated/pissed", the reason it annoys me because I know I will probably never be able to do that and I would if I could but that's just an issue for me I can't (seriously can't) fix.

Also, when people say they can't tolerate something because it affects them negatively like they always get reflux from eating certain stuff, you can't say to those people "Hey, you can, I know it" when they just seriously can't tolerate it because it always does that to them then even if you say 'you can, you can', that won't change anything. Also, reflux for example is a condition so that can become less severe. Also, saying the "you can" thing when a person has a chronic illness for example, that's just being a major asshole in my book.

[Steo]

Why is breaking a mirror 7 years bad luck also, it's a piece of glass like. I don't get 7 years bad luck for dropping a glass.

[The Jonster]

You could say the same thing about stepping on a crack breaks your mother’s back. Done that numerous times but my moms back is fine.

[Steo]

If you don't want to have bad luck, you can just touch wood/knock on wood. That surely will keep things from going wrong.

[Aaron]

I just discovered a pretty dumb saying: "sit on one's hand" which means not to do anything, to not take action apparently.

[Steo]

A watched kettle never boils is another one that makes no sense. It feels like it takes longer but it still boils eventually.

UPDATE: I remember one time a friend and I were saying random Irish phrases we were taught in school that we'd likely never even say in English, then he randomly just said "dún an fucking doras!".

[The Jonster]

I’m not really sure this counts, but I’m not sure why they say “The early bird catches the worm.”

Aren’t there lots of worms in the world today? So in essence may be lots of “worms” out there even if you don’t catch “the worm”.

[Steo]

What about the expression that something makes your skin crawl. I don't think my skin ever started crawling.

[Steo]

I just thought of another one, "you are what you eat". I understand the concept, but the phrase makes it sound like I'll be a burger if I eat one.

[PluMGMK]

Well, it means that your body is made up of material that starts out as part of the food you eat, which is kinda mind-bending when you think about it!

Anyway, here's something I meant to bring up during RD: we have a tray somewhere in the house that includes several humorous "statements" of Murphy's Law, like "The light at the end of the tunnel is just an oncoming train". But there's one on it that really could use some refinement:

The probability of toast landing butter-side-down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet

It's mathematically impossible for a probability to be directly proportional to an unbounded quantity like cost! This might have been a better formulation:

The probability of toast landing butter-side-up decays exponentially with the cost of the carpet

For low-cost carpets, to first order it's the same thing, but it makes mathematical sense for any cost.

[R4Y_ANC3L]

"THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT!"

This is in my opinion, a stupid saying. This would mean that even though the customer is actually being unreasonable, flat out selfish, etc, you just have to take it with no questions asked?

I feel like this saying is just a plain excuse for people to disrespect the employee who is working. The world is not fair. Fuck the human race.

[The Jonster]

“silence is golden”

Weird saying In a way. If we were to stay silent all our lives would we have tons of gold?!!

[Aaron]

"The early bird catches the worm" always seemed like a stupid concept to me since it just sounds like it's shaming night owls for being what they are and implying that somehow early birds are better than night owls. It's drawing comparisons and I don't like it.

[Hunchman801]

It's mathematically impossible for a probability to be directly proportional to an unbounded quantity like cost!

This would definitely annoy me too.