Corrupt a wish!

[EdgyRabbid]

granted, but they're full of small children.

I wish to get the first Simpsons seasons on DVD for Christmas.

[RayGamer99]

Granted, but the Grinch stole your DVD player!

I wish I didn't have as much schoolwork.

[EdgyRabbid]

Granted, but the ones you do get are very hard.

I wish Ned flonders was my dad!

[Greengoop]

I couldn’t find anything about Neo Flonders online so I’m gonna pretend he is a guy who promotes his trash soundcloud rap by blasting it on public transport. Granted, but he is insanely annoying and embarrassing, and many people who wish to befriend you end up distancing themselves from you before it.

I wish it was socially acceptable to walk around in public with corpsepaint.

[EdgyRabbid]

Granted.. that’s basically just emo makeup.

I wish I didn’t misspell the name of the Simpsons Nextdoor neighbor as much as I did…

[Greengoop]

Granted, but as he’s a simpsons character, he doesn’t need you for comedic misspelling value anymore so he cuts all ties with you and you have a permanent ban from watching The Simpsons ever again.

I wish some grass was naturally blue.

[EdgyRabbid]

Granted, but it’s straight up meth.


I wish I had service everywhere.

[Greengoop]

Granted, you’re forced to work community service as you are falsely accused of murdering 35 people on the 16th of December 1991 at 5:33 AM in Karaibrahimler, Bayramiç, Çanakkale, Turkey, with a Swiss Army Knife and a serving spoon. You are aggressively ridiculed and spat at as you clean the benches at a football stadium with a wooden comb with vegetable oil on it.

I wish there wasn’t only one decent quality video when I look online for something specific.

[EdgyRabbid]

Granted, but their writing quality is bad.

I wish I had 20 husbands.

[Greengoop]

Granted, your husbands are all from the North Aegean Islands, like to drink Mountain Dew mixed with Bin Juice and Liquidised Slag, and were born between 1921 and 1938 (with the exception of one born in 1659.) You also now have a shoe that will randomly disappear for 5 seconds at a time when you wear it in public.

I wish PS5s were forwards compatible with unreleased PS6 games.

[EdgyRabbid]

Granted, but they look like shit.

I wish I was in the Simpsons.

[Greengoop]

Granted, but you’re a side character in a scene where a mass murder takes place.

I wish summer holidays lasted until December.

[EdgyRabbid]

Granted, but you’d spend the entire year in school, even weekends.

I wish I had new hands.

[Greengoop]

Granted, but they mysteriously disintegrate after 31 minutes. And you fwr have a reputation with hand dealers so they won’t give you new ones.

I wish uselessly unforested areas had more forest cover.

[EdgyRabbid]

granted, but now there's so much oxygen in the air that people die from it.

I wish that the kids in my class didn't vape.

[Greengoop]

Granted, but you now have intense vape cravings despite your newfound inability to use one.

I wish you could do insane things at concerts and not get in any legal trouble.

[EdgyRabbid]

granted but you get laughed at on social media.

I wish I realized that I need another 500 tings for the next rank

[Greengoop]

Granted, you clearly did if you made that post.

I wish industry plants weren’t allowed to take off.

[EdgyRabbid]

Granted, but now music is banned.

I wish to help people

[Greengoop]

Granted, you give loads of help everyone on the planet except for one poor random dude that now has to watch everyone around him be uncontrollably happy.

I wish I had a drum kit so my friends could practice music at my house.