Corrupt a wish!

[Master]

So be it, now burn to a crisp.

I want some crisps.

[Bradandez]

They're burnt.

I wish to un-crisped now.

[Master]

You're now pale, and are an empty husk of a man.

I wish that I don't confuse threads.

[Bradandez]

Sure but now you're confused in general.

I wish to go to France.

[Master]

Sadly, I took your place, your sacrifice was appreciated.

I wish to unsee many things.

[Bradandez]

Great now you're blind.

I wish to be the best hide-and-seek player in the world.

[Master]

No-one finds you, ever, you are gone forever.

I wish I didn't have to go to sleep now.

[Bradandez]

Sure. Now you're nocturnal.

I wish to fly a kite.

[Master]

It flew straight into a Pylon, shocking, to say the least.

I wish for better resilience.

[Dark Lum Lord]

Wish granted; you are so resilient that no challenges face you in life anymore, which may seem pleasant at first but this soon proves to make your life much less fulfilling.

Some ganja, please.

[Master]

You got it, but its obscurity causes it to vanish at first contact.

I wish to be more informed.

[Dark Lum Lord]

You know of everything in this universe and become severely depressed.

I wish for no homework.

[Master]

You don't get any, now everyone fails.

I wish to go to sleep sometime soon.

[Dark Lum Lord]

Wish granted; you sleep. Six feet under.

I wanna know what love is.

[Master]

It was expressed using the ever so popular video, your attempt at mimicking it went badly, as you cannot drive.

I wish to be a good driver.

[Bradandez]

Granted! Now everyone is a worse driver than you.

I wish for a wish.

[Master]

You get the wish, but it's only a curse.

I wish I didn't have this headache and lightheadedness.

[Dark Lum Lord]

Wish granted; off to bed with you, bury that hangover under the pillow, pal. Smother it with a pillow in dire situations.

I wish for a hug.

[Master]

You get a hug, from Melvin, who's got the Millennium Rod of Stabbiness, good luck!

I wish I weren't in a bad mood with this work.

[Dark Lum Lord]

Wish granted; you have a manic episode, which is great a first but eventually you dabble outside of reality.

I want to add a bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.