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Rayman3DS said:
RayFan9876 said:
Well, what did she say?
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She said that she was in love with this other guy, and that we could still be Best friends.
I couldn't really listen to the rest, so I just walked away
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Aw, that's not the right thing to do. Honestly, I think you might have hurt her more by walking away than she did by telling you this.
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I disagree, pretty good action this was. He doesn't have to stay friends with her. This is not something you can just casually hand wave and say "Sure ok :wink: ".

He was honest. He walks away, implying he doesn't care anymore.

He may have been hurt more than her, actually. Would she have been hurt? Maybe, but it wouldn't matter. He didn't cause a fit or anything, he just walked away and let her do what she wanted. Again, good action there.

Stay friends? He could have, but... No one would want to. Not after being in a relationship with that person.

(Although him walking away may imply he didn't really have much interest in her, but that is ehhhhh because I didn't read anything about it)
 
neo said:
I disagree, pretty good action this was. He doesn't have to stay friends with her. This is not something you can just casually hand wave and say "Sure ok :wink: ".

He was honest. He walks away, implying he doesn't care anymore.

He may have been hurt more than her, actually. Would she have been hurt? Maybe, but it wouldn't matter. He didn't cause a fit or anything, he just walked away and let her do what she wanted. Again, good action there.
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She was probably hoping that he would understand in the best way possible, and if he walks away in anger, then she would probably end up feeling just as crushed that he took it the wrong way.

What do you mean by "it wouldn't matter?" Are you saying that she was being ruder about it even though he's the one who walked away, now making her feel like shit for just being honest? Sure, he was being honest as well, but if she were to act the way he did, she would have said "Hey, I'm not your girlfriend anymore, go fuck yourself."
 
RayFan9876 said:
neo said:
I disagree, pretty good action this was. He doesn't have to stay friends with her. This is not something you can just casually hand wave and say "Sure ok :wink: ".

He was honest. He walks away, implying he doesn't care anymore.

He may have been hurt more than her, actually. Would she have been hurt? Maybe, but it wouldn't matter. He didn't cause a fit or anything, he just walked away and let her do what she wanted. Again, good action there.
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She was probably hoping that he would understand in the best way possible, and if he walks away in anger, then she would probably end up feeling just as crushed that he took it the wrong way.

What do you mean by "it wouldn't matter?" Are you saying that she was being ruder about it even though he's the one who walked away, now making her feel like shit for just being honest? Sure, he was being honest as well, but if she were to act the way he did, she would have said "Hey, I'm not your girlfriend anymore, go fuck yourself."
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There would be no 'taking it the wrong way'. He obviously understood. He was heartbroken, instead of listening to the whole story, he would rather walk away. [it's one of those 'I need a minute to think' sort of situations, mixed in with 'Ok, whatever...'] I think that is a natural reaction to that. (Just as natural as falling in love with another person)

No, I am not. He already feels like shit, and it obviously wasn't like that. It was good of her to be honest though, don't get me wrong. It only seems to me he [was emotionally distraught] and walked away. Why do you assume he was only angry?



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Anyways, you say that he shouldn't have done that. What should he have done and why, in your opinion?
 
In my opinion he should have at least something to let her know he doesn't hate her, something as simple as "if it makes you happy" before stalking off.
 
RayFan9876 said:
In my opinion he should have at least something to let her know he doesn't hate her, something as simple as "if it makes you happy" before stalking off.
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Is this opinion based off what you would do if you were in his shoes? Have you ever dealt with similar situations such as this?

While I do think it's best to not be rude, but sometimes a person can not think too well on that when they are suddenly crushed because a girl loved someone else. A lot of things would have rushed through his mind on that matter. Like example, was she seeing this guy behind his back?

At least he did do something right, he walked away with out saying anything... how? By not reacting in such a harsh way against her, or cussing her out, name calling, etc.
 
Hoodcom said:
Is this opinion based off what you would do if you were in his shoes? Have you ever dealt with similar situations such as this?
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Precisely this actually, around the same age about three to four years back, and many worse ones as well.

Hoodcom said:
While I do think it's best to not be rude, but sometimes a person can not think too well on that when they are suddenly crushed because a girl loved someone else. A lot of things would have rushed through his mind on that matter. Like example, was she seeing this guy behind his back?

At least he did do something right, he walked away with out saying anything... how? By not reacting in such a harsh way against her, or cussing her out, name calling, etc.
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That makes sense. I know this may sound stupid to bring up, but he's thirteen; what in hell was he expecting, that they would live the next five years of school happily ever after?

Unfortunately I'm not going to further share my opinion more in-depth, because I haven't exactly been brought up the way most kids have, so I might share quite a different standpoint when it comes to reacting to certain situations.
 
I didn't know he was thirteen years old, that does change a lot. So no, it wasn't stupid to bring up. It is a valid point.

With that, he has plenty, plenty of time to meet the right girl eventually. May not be today, may not be next week, heck, it may not even be for the next 20 years, you never know.

Your opinion isn't a bad thing, we all were brought up differently in our homes. Feel free to continue your opinion. I just wasn't aware of his age when I stated my opinion. :wink:
 
Ah, good thing for understanding.

My opinion tends to be a little bit colder when it comes to dealing with events and acting rationally. In my opinion, regardless of how someone feels about a situation like that, they should always push aside selfish emotion to make room for rational thought, even if it's difficult. Even if someone did something absolutely horrible to you or someone else and they are truly sorry for it, torturing their conscious can potentially cause even more emotional trauma to them than they have caused toward you. They'll live with the guilt knowing that not only have they had something taken from them (which is the victim's standpoint), but in order to rid themselves of overwhelming guilt, they need recognition and understanding from the victim. Tragedy is much easier to get over than a guilty conscience.

What I was saying above was assuming that the "offender" had done something wrong. However, in a situation like this where the offender - her - has done nothing wrong, I feel there's even more initiative to act rationally.


On a side note, for me, the mere thought of middle/high school love (unless you're in your twelfth year or so) just makes me sick. It's only asking for unnecessary trouble and drama.
 
RayFan9876 said:
Ah, good thing for understanding.

My opinion tends to be a little bit colder when it comes to dealing with events and acting rationally. In my opinion, regardless of how someone feels about a situation like that, they should always push aside selfish emotion to make room for rational thought, even if it's difficult. Even if someone did something absolutely horrible to you or someone else and they are truly sorry for it, torturing their conscious can potentially cause even more emotional trauma to them than they have caused toward you. They'll live with the guilt knowing that not only have they had something taken from them (which is the victim's standpoint), but in order to rid themselves of overwhelming guilt, they need recognition and understanding from the victim. Tragedy is much easier to get over than a guilty conscience.

What I was saying above was assuming that the "offender" had done something wrong. However, in a situation like this where the offender - her - has done nothing wrong, I feel there's even more initiative to act rationally.
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I honestly don't see it being cold, but well truthful. I do think people should push aside selfish emotions, not just in situations such as this. Being considerate for others does go a long way.

Honestly, just because you break up with someone, or someone breaks up with you, doesn't mean the friendship has to end as well. I know the pain is there, but it eventually will go away.

RayFan9876 said:
On a side note, for me, the mere thought of middle/high school love (unless you're in your twelfth year or so) just makes me sick. It's only asking for unnecessary trouble and drama.
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I was going to mention the same thing in my previous post, but I bit my tongue in case it was to offend the youngsters here. Really, I can not agree more. My younger cousin who is 13, had got herself a boyfriend, and I asked her why... her answer? "Because I like him and he likes me"

That was the only reason... I let it go, because it's her choice, and her mom's decision to control.

When I was that age, I wasn't girl crazy, last thing on my mind was dating. Even to today, I have not ever dated nor have I even been to interested. Mainly because I see a lot of guys who work for the company I work for, who deal with some very... very crazy women they rush out to marry in a heart beat. Same for my own brother, actually... I'm definitely going to wait as long as I need. :shock:
 
Hoodcom said:
I honestly don't see it being cold, but well truthful. I do think people should push aside selfish emotions, not just in situations such as this. Being considerate for others does go a long way.
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That's good. Unfortunately, a lot of people view "truthfulness" as being "cold," which I find rather annoying. They like to sugar-coat everything. However, if you've always grown up without the sugar-coating, then the truth isn't hard to handle at all.

Hoodcom said:
Honestly, just because you break up with someone, or someone breaks up with you, doesn't mean the friendship has to end as well. I know the pain is there, but it eventually will go away.
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Exactly. If someone were to think that it did have to end, then they obviously didn't love the person for any other reason than intimate purposes.

Hoodcom said:
I was going to mention the same thing in my previous post, but I bit my tongue in case it was to offend the youngsters here. Really, I can not agree more. My younger cousin who is 13, had got herself a boyfriend, and I asked her why... her answer? "Because I like him and he likes me"

That was the only reason... I let it go, because it's her choice, and her mom's decision to control.
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Blech.

Hoodcom said:
When I was that age, I wasn't girl crazy, last thing on my mind was dating. Even to today, I have not ever dated nor have I even been to interested. Mainly because I see a lot of guys who work for the company I work for, who deal with some very... very crazy women they rush out to marry in a heart beat. Same for my own brother, actually... I'm definitely going to wait as long as I need. :shock:
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I'm not at that age yet but I have similar things going on with a lot of my friends. Fortunately, my two closest friends are reasonable to not do that, but the others are so foolish - one I've been counseling out of suicide over and over again, because she was so addicted to her boyfriend that whenever there was a slight bump in the road she would try to kill herself. The funny thing with that is her homelife was great, at least compared to what mine was, and her friends all treat her well, though they are starting to get sick of her now that she's become absorbed in the "typical teenage angst." What do I think? I have almost zero tolerance for teenage angst, but it's nearly impossible to snap someone out of it in an instant, so it needs to be one gradually.

How did I arrive at that topic? Anyway, it was in relation to how some young people, and even older people, are so eager to get something done (such as finding a partner) and to make up their mind that they completely miss the point.

For me, I'm not going to go looking for love - in fact, I'll probably end up avoiding it because I'm very uninterested in the concept, but perhaps at some point in my life it will hit me. When that happens, it happens, and I don't care when it happens.
 
RayFan9876 said:
For me, I'm not going to go looking for love - in fact, I'll probably end up avoiding it because I'm very uninterested in the concept, but perhaps at some point in my life it will hit me. When that happens, it happens, and I don't care when it happens.
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It's not necessarily "love" being the issue, the real issue is "lust". Many people think they are in love, when it really is lust. Which only lasts so long, and which ends up in many divorces and breakups when the real love isn't there. Sad, but true.



Danone said:
If SOPA is accept by USA, we can say good bye to Youtube and Facebook
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As far as I'm aware, currently they either have been dropped or postponed.
 
SOPA has been put on a long waiting list now, we won't be hearing about it for a while, just like Harold Camping.

Hoodcom said:
For me, I'm not going to go looking for love - in fact, I'll probably end up avoiding it because I'm very uninterested in the concept, but perhaps at some point in my life it will hit me. When that happens, it happens, and I don't care when it happens.
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that's a good point.
 
Apparently they now presented another set of bills, that do something similar... I forgot what they were called... ACTA or something, I think.
 
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