Corrupt a wish!

[Bradandez]

HQ? I thought you said DQ. You get your very own secret Dairy Queen! The ice cream is expired though.

I wish for all the keys in TF2.

[Master]

You get them all, only to find the locks are missing.

I wish to know where these lock thieves have run off to.

[Bradandez]

You know. They are in magic DEATH pony's bum.

I wish to stop thinking about magic little DEATH pony.

[Master]

It happens, but without Magical Death Pony, your purpose in life is no longer there, you have no purpose now.

I wish to become a professor.

[Adsolution]

Unfortunately, you become a professor of poop.

I wish to keep that awesome French hat with a rose in it that I found on the ground outside my house which ended up belonging to Gabby.

[OCG]

Well, Gabby wont let you keep it.

I wish for enternal life.

[Master]

Your wish ascends you into an immaterial plane, where you cannot interact with anything, and nothing can interact with you, there, you shall live for eternity.

I wish Stargates were real.

[Shrooblord]

A Stargate is built right outside your house, which, when it opens, sucks you and your entire neighbourhood into the schisms of time and space, into subspace even, where you now exist beyond time. Apparently you turned into a god. But alas, nobody believes in you. And gods cannot exist without believers, so you fade.

I wish I knew a friendly Veigar.

[Master]

You do, sadly, he's an outcast, meaning that he's prone to massive tantrums and huge outbreaks of destruction.

I wish I knew what I was on about.

[Dark Lum Lord]

For the rest of eternity, your thoughts consist entirely of what you were on about and absolutely nothing else.

I wish that Rare would return to Nintendo and create good games once more.

[Master]

They return, but their age means that they need help to make good games, and eventually, they just merge with Retro, whose own quality begins to decline as a result.

Why do we assume the worst?

[Dark Lum Lord]

Pessimism is always the final solution.

I wish that you hadn't broken the game.

[Adsolution]

It was inevitable, they were playing Rayman 3 HD.

I wish I had more time.

[Keane]

You have more time, but all this time is being spend getting anally raped by Nicolas Cage

I wish I could skip this school year and maybe next year too.

[Bradandez]

They had some fun events during those years.

I wish to have a nifty hat!

[Keane]

Wish granted, but it's the item of clothing you can ever wear from now on.

I want Jim Carrey made a good movie again.

[Disionity]

He does, but viewing the film sends a hypnotic message to your mind, sending you into an eternal slumber.

I wish for an actual desktop PC.

[Keane]

You receive the PC, but every week Gabe Newell spams it with viruses and changes your background to his beautiful face.

I wish humans didn't have to sleep.

[Master]

It happens, but they can never dream now, never dream...

I wish to stop confusing this for the questions thread.

[Eredin]

It happens, but they can never dream now, never dream...

I wish to stop confusing this for the questions thread.

How do I corrupt a wish?

I wish for Betilla to make me into rayman