Corrupt a wish!

Granted but everyone starts singing and talking about it all the time

I wish I could skip any day of my life but remember what happened
 
Everybody does, but by a sheer mixup instead of "Thick of it", every station plays "Blurred Lines" by Robin Thicke.

I wish Lenovo still made Thinkpads with classic 7-row keyboards.
 
Granted, but the demand is so high their production leaves hundreds of faults

I wish I could control what time I woke up
 
Granted, but you wake up to the same day (Groundhog Day) every time.

I wish I could go back to the beginning of the season, put some money on the Cubbies.
 
Granted, but you got addicted to pain and died from internal injuries. 😱

I wish I knew how to skate well enough to play ice hockey.
 
Granted, but everyone else hogs the puck for the entire game so you never get any action.

I wish I could pet wild animals without them trying to run away or kill me.
 
Granted, but now they all follow you home and devour your neighbors.

I wish I could speak every language on the planet.
 
Granted, but you weren’t talk how to speak sophisticatedly, so you end up bad-mouthing everyone and get beaten up

I wish I had a real gun
 
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