Jokes topic

I got a really cute dog and called him Threemiles. It sounds great to say I walk Threemiles twice a day.
 
This is definitely me... :lol:

If you start to think I talk too much, just tell me. We’ll talk about it.
 
Q: What is the most erotic number?
A: 2110593!
Q: Why?
A: When 2 are 1 and don't pay at10tion, they'll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, they'll be 3.
 
Aaron said:
Knock knock.

Who's there?

Deja vu.

Deja vu wh-

Knock knock.
Click to expand...

I literally just got deja vu from this, ironically. :lol: Anywho...

Mother, “How was school today, Patrick?”

Patrick, “It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!”

Mother, “Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?”

Patrick, “What school?”
 
What does the worst boxing match ever and this terrible joke have in common?

They both have no punch line.
 
A patient sobs to his doctor: I feel like a pair of curtains!!

Doctor: Well pull yourself together man!!!
 
A woman says she can't stop thinking about Dick. A guy walks up and whispers something in her ear. She turns around and angrily screams: "You dirty little pervert! You just wait my husband Dick gets off work! He's gonna kick the living shit out of you!"
 
You and Plum might laugh at this. :lol:

Which country's capital is always growing.
Ireland's.

Every year it's Dublin.
 
The Jonster said:
You and Plum might laugh at this. :lol:

Which country's capital is always growing.
Ireland's.

Every year it's Dublin.
Click to expand...
I'm an eejit hahaha. I didn't get it until I thought Dublin (doubling) :lol:

I have to admit that's a good one :P

Edit: I know it's from another source as I heard it before but forgot, it's going in my sig now though lol.
 
Steo said:
The Jonster said:
You and Plum might laugh at this. :lol:

Which country's capital is always growing.
Ireland's.

Every year it's Dublin.
Click to expand...
I'm an eejit hahaha. I didn't get it until I thought Dublin (doubling) :lol:

I have to admit that's a good one :P

Edit: I know it's from another source as I heard it before but forgot, it's going in my sig now though lol.
Click to expand...

You are correct about that!! :P
I noticed when I was looking through funny jokes.
 
I made this up just now:

Why doesn't the claw machine work?

Because it doesn't make cents.
 
Apparently taking a day off is not something you should do when you work for a calendar company.
 
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